I’m not sure what to do with this blog. It has morphed many times as I have in the past few years that I have maintained it. It was a space of expression that I used to enjoy and maintain daily for a couple of years. It was a place that was an outpouring of my inner thoughts that I shared with no one, and when they were here they were shared with everyone. But then it became a place of activities, events, campaigns and anger. Nothing wrong with that… but it went away from the personal to the distant. Today, when i write it is deeply personal and vulnerable and I dont want to expose that. So I write and the writings get buried away in an electronic archive.
But I think back at a time when I did expose my self and I did make my self vulnerable, and it was OK. What has changed? Am I censoring myself? I feel I censor myself for others and because of them. I know when I was in Lebanon, that that was why I stopped writing altogether. I am no longer in that place or space, yet I still cant bring myself to say the things I want to say. Censorship, self censorship is a scary thing.