I wrote a post a year ago about broken hearts and it is still true today as it was back then. But I can say with all certainty that there is light at the end of the tunnel. And for now I have dropped my membership and moved on.  To those that have recently joined the club, I am more than happy to lend an ear or give a love filled hug. Once again here is to forgetting, forgiving and moving on. Cheers!

Whole heartedly

S.

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The title is from a movie but the club is real. Everywhere I turn I see broken hearts, unfulfilled desires and loves lost before being gained. Sometimes, though I do see relationships that are working and people who are lovingly together and they give us all hope.

Having a broken heart means you feel, having a lost love means you have the capacity to love another (not just yourself). It also means that sometime in the future you will feel this once more, if you let yourself. Humans are adaptive things, and just like we adapt to being in a relationship we adapt to being out of one too. We learn to give and take and take and give. We adapt to the cycles of love and life and we learn to grow with each one.

Yes some people break our hearts a lot more than others, because we let them in deeper. But I think that only reaffirms how human we are and how we can feel at a much more profound level. It may also mean the mending may take longer, but it does happen. Slowly but surely you regain your sense of self, your sense of worth and you blossom once again. Start superficially and move slowly, meaningfully, back into life. It is hard but it can be done. And then you are once again ready for love, and maybe even loss again.

I know how the memory still lingers, the anger still eats at you, and the longing hurts you. But I also know that with time you forget, you forgive, you move on. I know how sleepless nights haunt you, how clarity eludes you, and the will to move on dissipates. But I also know that sleep will come back, focus is round the corner, and free will always prevails. I know the numerous times you look at your phone waiting for a ring, I know the urges to scream and shout in frustration and anger, I know the feeling of complete and utter despair. But I also know that the phone will eventually ring with your best friend cheering you up, I know the exhaustion of a long angry walk, I know the satisfaction of a good cry. I know there is light and love at the end of the tunnel, because that is the circle of life.

To those of you with broken hearts, and you know who you are, it is not an exclusive club. All are welcome to join, because in the club we drink to forgetting, forgiving and moving on. Cheers!